Riflessioni sul Perdono, sulla Dignità e sulla Riconciliazione
Assaad Chaftari
1. I negoziati di pace, generalmente, sono incentrati sulle dimensioni politica ed economica. Quale è la Sua percezione della necessità di toccare aspetti più profondi e genuini della riconciliazione e come si può ottenere questo?
I think that negotiations have always had a missing dimension: the simplest human being involved in the incident. We rarely see victims around the table of negotiation. We never see the leaders around the table speak of what they carry in their hearts against the Other.
As someone I respect a lot said once: “The problems are not in the documents or issues on the table but most certainly in the hearts of those around the table of negotiations.”
History and historical reasons for the crisis are never discussed or studied, the personality of the leaders who fought or struggled are never discussed, their inner sicknesses (ego, jealousy, anger, love of power, greed, personal responsibility etc.)
Their personal role in inflaming the situation can be studied more closely.
We should be able in any negotiation to touch the hearts of the leaders, the negotiators, the governments, and each and every heart involved in the process including the normal individuals from both sides.
2. Quali sono le condizioni nelle quali, al di là dell’assicurare gli interessi della parti in conflitto, può essere stabilito un processo incentrato su un senso di equità e dignità?
One has first to define who are the parties we speak about. Are these governments, leaders and or citizens from conflicting countries? I would add to each negotiations persons representing civil society caring about individuals, missing people, victims etc. They know better the need of their society because they have the feel of the simple human being. They know about historical wounds, the sufferings, the grudge against the Other, revenge… and fairness and dignity are directly sensed and felt by common people not politicians and political negotiators. There should be justice, there should be truth, there should be compensation, there should be apologies, there should reconciliation in the roots of society with the one between the leaders or else we would be preparing for future trouble when politicians or circumstances change. Any process if not centered on the Human Being is doomed to be only ink on a document.
3. Quanto il perdono è essenziale alla dimensione della riconciliazione? Alla radice della Sua cultura politica e/o della Sua fede religiosa quali sono i principi che implicano o escludono il perdono? Quali versi o detti che fanno parte del Suo personale patrimonio spirituale possono, nella sua opinione, avere un significato universale
As a Christian I think that the main message brought by Christ was Love. Loving those we symptasize is not the issues here. No. Love your enemies, those who harmed you.
The second idiom that changed my life was: ”Be the change you want to see in your countries, communities etc.”
The third idea that is the compass of my life today is: are you on the good side or the bad side of the river of life?
4. Il perdono richiede qualche forma di pentimento da parte di coloro a cui il perdono viene offerto? Il perdono ha condizioni o è senza condizioni?
Forgiveness does not necessary require repentance from the other side. It would be a little bit easier if the second party repents and asks for this forgiveness. It stays very personal. We cannot force one to forgive but we can create the proper environment for that. Moral values, religious values, cultural values, society values if explained, taught properly, positively can change the mood of resentful people.
But to work on the victimizer is also very important if not as important as the latter. If he decides to face what he did, be truthful towards himself, God and his society then towards the party of his victims, admitting he did wrong, apologizing (seriously), announce his repentance publicly and promising to redeem himself and help his victims can be very helpful in bringing many historical crisis to good ends. Being forgiven should not be a condition for him to do so.